Growing up, I never could understand the concept of grace. I didn't understand what I was supposed to feel if I were in a state of grace. It was such an ephemeral concept and I just couldn't wrap my head around it. I was in my early 40's when I finally understood.
I learned about grace in the worst of times. It was during a time when I was afraid of losing everything that was important to me. My relationship with my children, house, and my money. It was a very scary time.
It was August 8, 2008. 8-8-8. I was driving to Albuquerque when my angel said, "You can no longer live by readings, its time for you to live by grace." I must tell you, I freaked. Being highly intuitive my whole life I read the energies around me. I could read them 6 months to two years in advance to know what was coming, but during this time, I couldn't feel a thing. It was as if someone turned off my antenna.
For two weeks I couldn't feel a thing. And, I sure didn't understand grace. I took a walk in the park to clear my head one particularly hard day and told God, "You are going to have to show me what grace is because I don't understand what you are talking about!" The next thing I knew I had a mystical experience right there in the park. God showed me a clear tube surrounding me that went into the ground about a foot or so and went up into the sky as far as I could see. God said, "Bring your children, house, and bank account to me," and directed me to the center of my chest. God was with me, in me, all around me. The Presence was was so strong that as I brought all those things into my center and gave them to the Light, one by one, they were taken up.
My heart and mind were no longer racing. There was a sense of peace and tranquility I had only known a few times prior to this. A deep, abiding peace filled my entire being. I finished my walk and faced what needed to be faced. The emotional and mental strength and courage I needed to have a difficult conversation with my ex-husband arose out of nowhere, so I had the conversation, and waited.
Within a few days the issue was resolved.
I had to have the courage to accept grace and in return, I was gifted with more courage.
There are times in our life where all the grace in the world cannot change a circumstance. It is in the darkest of times when the change we want is not possible, these are the times we need to accept grace the most. It has been my experience that whenever I make a request of the light, the call is answered in some way. Asking for grace is asking for an experience of Divine Presence. Not knowing the outcome that Divine Presence will bring, is the biggest hurdle. When we are in pain or fear, it is hard to trust something as ephemeral as grace. But you will never know if you don't ask to know.
To all my friends who may be facing dark and painful times, I pray grace for you, and will hold a space for you to receive the courage that grace brings.
All My Love,