Non-linear, non-ordinary states of consciousness experiences have been a part of my life for a very long time. Past life recall at 5, leaving my body for the first time at 9, and talking to dead people at 13 were just a few of the experiences that I had in childhood. When I married at the age of 18 these experiences and my spiritual abilities understandably freaked my husband out. While my prophetic dreams, visions, and knowledge were always validated by others, he really wanted me to stop it. He didn’t understand any of it and it scared him. I wanted to be a normal person, in a normal environment so I could make my husband happy and raise my children properly.
And most of all, I wanted him to be happy, so I asked God to make the experiences and abilities stop. I continued to petition God until they stopped. Ask and you shall receive...All the experiences and conscious connection to Spirit stopped. When my oldest daughter was four, I realized she also had the gift. But because I had promised my husband that I wouldn’t “make the children weird,” I didn’t say anything to her about it. I made note but did nothing.
When my youngest daughter was five and she displayed the gifts, I couldn’t stay silent any longer. I knew they had the right to connect to Spirit in this way and to discover whatever was meant for them to discover and master. I taught them energy healing and monitored their progress. My husband didn’t like it, but he couldn’t deny what he saw with his own eyes from his own children.
My experiences and gifts stayed tightly in their box. When my best friend from childhood committed suicide and was on the other side, she came to visit me and the door to the non-linear aspects of reality were wide open once again. It was like a breath of fresh air. As much as I did not want to cause problems in my family, I could not stop the connection. My gifts came roaring back, my meditations increased in depth and connection to Spirit, and my devotion to be a better person kept pulling me forward to heal my childhood wounds the best I could.
Between my friend’s death and noticing the increasing gifting in my children, I just couldn’t keep my promise to my husband. My children were not weird. They had beautiful hearts, were intelligent, kind, and open to the non-linear realms of existence. I simply could not let them go through those experiences alone as I had. My oldest child was 12 and the youngest was 5 when I began to affirm their gifting and guide them when they encountered difficulty being with, processing, or have non-linear situations arise that were beyond their level of development to handle on their own, just as I did regarding the linear aspects of life. They are now adults with their own lives and families and are more than well adjusted, successful members of society living the lives they wanted to create for themselves, and these experiences are a non-issue for them.
Because these experiences and giftings were treated as normal and they had an education on how to set boundaries with non-linear beings as well as those still in human form and how to determine what is helpful and not helpful, and the experiences were not either dismissed or aggrandized, they developed healthy psyches and personas related to their spiritual connection.
Eventually, I filed for divorce. To date that was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. After the divorce I gave myself permission to do what I wanted to do more than anything else, buy tickets to a San Antonio Spurs NBA game, walk the Camino De Santiago De Compestella in Northern Spain, meditate, and connect to divinity. Hey, don’t knock the NBA, its poetry in motion baby.
I walked the Camino in May and June of 2006 and went back to Texas ready to finalize the divorce process. Moving into a small apartment I had time to meditate and eventually sat in meditation for 3-4 hours at a time, reaching states of “no mind” and had increasing experiences of what is termed Samadi. This was a time rich with the transient, mystical experiences talked about in works like Gopi Krishna’s book on Kundalini.
2007 was a pivotal year. While I have had many mystical experiences since around the age of 12, these new profound states of being experienced from 2006 onward taxed my central nervous system and uncovered new areas of resistance to spiritual development. Neither my central nervous system or my soul were fully capable of holding those states for more than a couple years. There was more maturity, understanding, and mastery to be with as I continued to ground into my new reality.
When I created the SpiritPath coaching model in 2007 I honestly had not heard the terms “Spiritual Emergence and Emergencies.” But I was very familiar with the challenges of being in touch with my inner self and the non-linear world of Spirit in a world that did not necessary value or appreciate my connection and drive that came from the inner and multidimensional planes of existence. I knew all too well the intense drive of an unexpressed desire of Self and the havoc that can create. And I knew about the courage, compassion, and consistency it takes to face it and move from the disempowered miscreations of the underdeveloped self to a more coherent,creative, and fulfilling expression.
This new weekly blog will be a chronicle of the integration of the unfolding that began on the Camino de Santiago and will share my new Camino that began last year. I hope you enjoy it and that it inspires you to walk your own Camino.
Buen Camino! Love and Blessings Elizabeth J. Sabet